mothers love

A mother's love is like a circle.
It has no beginning and no ending.
It keeps going around and around ever expanding,
touching everyone who comes in contact with it.
Engulfing them like the morning's mist,
warming them like the noontime sun
and covering them like a blanket.

Unwritten by hand

What lies between longhand and shorthand? The lost world of handwriting. Perhaps the term 'lost world' is a bit of an exaggeration. Disappearing is better.
   If I could I would've written in this space instead of indulging in e-finger point pressure . But clearly in this age of technology, its e-finger point pressure that is the way to communicate. Time was when we had out knuckles rapped for forgetting to dot the I's and cross the T's. When the long strokes of a 'g' were supposed to be practiced till the alphabet looked like a dancer hugging herself at the waist, when the 'w' needed to sit on delicately curved derriere, when the 'a' was plump and the 'b' was full-bellied. The sentences formed then with such finely crafted alphabets looked like art- the art of handwriting. In fact, the marriage of profession and handwriting is one of the most fascinating phenomena that history has given us. From the architectural precision of Frank Lloyd Wright's handwriting to the flourishes of Leonardo da Vinci to the fluidity of Miro, handwriting took its place along with the other greats in the world of art... till the keyboard arrived. The rest is history- of mouse and men, so to speak!

The art of saying NO

Most people say 'yes' much more readily than 'no'. Many respond 'yes' automatically to requests, neglecting to consider their own interests and feelings, and are then angry with themselves afterwards. Saying 'no' requires courage and considerable practice. Saying 'yes' is always easier because you receive a grateful smile in response or similar indication of pleasure. Everyone wants to be liked. Saying 'no' risks losing the affection of the person asking the favour, status in the community or even a job.
   Uncertain times in particular bring this tendency to the fore, with the result that many people rather say 'yes' in spite of themselves just for the sake of keeping the peace. Anyone should be able to say 'no'. There's a lot to be gained from facing down the fear of saying 'no'.
   Rejecting a request can help to stabilize a relationship, because it helps establish limits and to express genuine feelings. But for people like me, who are accustomed to agreeing to every request, changing can be a long and uncomfortable learning process.
   Before we are able to say 'no' in a particular situation, we have to give ourselves permission internally. This happens only if we have corrected the negative attitudes we associate with saying 'no' and which prevent us from doing so. "If I say 'no' then the other person will reject me and his affection is important to me," is an attitude often expressed. But this can be replaced by: "I don't know whether he's going to reject me, but if he only likes me because I always do what suits him, then the price of his affection is too high in the long term. I can put up with having him reject me." It is, however, important to formulate the refusal in language that does not cause offence.
    Talking to the other person about a mutual solution to any difference of opinion is the key. One needs to present the situation from one's own point of view, and to suggest how the situation can be developed to the advantage of both parties. The other person must have the feeling that his interests are also being considered. The refusal is, after all, painful for both.

  

Once upon a time...

Once upon a time leadership mattered, now dealership rules the world.
Once upon a time quality was a craftsman's pride, now it is a departmental mess.
Once upon a time a mouse was an untouchable mammal, now its a handled pest.

Once upon a time wisdom was cultivated by wise people, now it is flashed on T-shirts.
Once upon a time teachers taught and students learnt, now teachers trade and students consume.
Once upon a time population was a problem, now it is a flourishing mass market.
Once upon a time competition brought out the best in products, now it brings out the worst in people.
Once upon a time there was a golden rule, now if you have gold, you rule.
Once upon a time truth telling was good for your soul, now it is bad for your promotion.
Once upon a time success meant living by ideals, now it is about rising above all principles.
Once upon a time beauty was in the eye of the beholder, now its a blooming business.
Once upon a time the government was clean and sex was dirty! Now, one doesn't know!

The negative side of positive thinking

Thoughts are neither negative nor positive. Thoughts just are. What they turn out to be, depends on the context. Given a context, thoughts can be realistic or unrealistic; mean or generous; selfish or selfless. Many chronic positive thinkers insist that the glass is half full- do they still remain positive when the glass is half full of polluted water? A positive thinking fellow is like someone who decides that it is more honourable to fall down from the Eiffel tower rather than from a ten storied building! It doesn't matter where you fall from, the consequences will be disastrous. In reality no positive thought can arise without a negative thought hiding around it. They are like the two poles of a magnet. For instance if i ask you not to think of Katrina Kaif for the next one minute- you will invariably think of her!
   Positive thinking can turn negative very quickly. Why? Because they originate from the same source. They are interconnected like marigold and manure. It takes a blooming marigold just a few days to become manure. Similarly, manure becomes a flower in the course of time. Marigold and manure are two expressions of one shared identity. Negative thinking comes from the same shared space as positive thinking. I am not endorsing positive thinking. I am simply saying, thoughts become positive or negative depending on you. It is you who sets the standards and values by which you evaluate thoughts. Alot of people talk about falling standards of everything: food, music, newspapers, movies, the young generation or whatever. Actually standards have neither fallen nor risen. Standards have just shifted; your value frames have changed.

rest your past

I am beginning to think that people with good memory lead a very miserable life. No offence meant but who would like to remember every detail of the past? We have enough problems dealing with the present without letting the past muddle up with our thoughts.
   Though I have a lot of respect for people who keep a diary but I would personally not like to take a peek into my past. This is the reason why I would never write my memoirs because the past to me is fast becoming a very distant blur.
   The problems with the times gone by is that they remind you of nothing but the crisis and dilemmas that you would rather forget.
   Don't get me wrong. I like history but not my own. Wars that have been won by the heroes of the past make fascinating reading but personal battles scrolled in a diary do not. The greatest lesson we can learn about history books is that nobody bothers to read them over and over again. Why should you want to recall your schooldays and be reminded of a bully who gave you a torrid time?
   The past has no good memories-even a happy family trip can remind you of the times that you can never get back. Why waste time delving deep in the recess of your memory when you have a lot to accomplish right now? Although experience is the product of the past but it is best forgotten once lessons have been learned. Letting memories linger on is like leaving an injury untreated to remind you of the fall that you should have avoided. If you look closely, we sometimes hesitate making progress when we remember an incident that happened a while ago.
   The mistakes of the past and the fear of the future usually are two pivotal reasons that keep us locked within ourselves. Unfortunately, not all of us have the ability to lift our heads from the gloom of the past. It strikes hard when we least suspect it and spreads its darkness to smolder all hopes.
   Usually, the seemingly strongest people become victims while the weak come through it unscathed. The signs are always there, though at times, maybe difficult to dictate the symptoms. We can help if we see a change of routine or a drastic shift of one's disposition. No one would come forward and say,"I'm depressed." It is not that simple because depression is a result of some aspects of the past not dealt successfully.
   So should we let our past rest in peace? I certainly think so. Clinging to it shrouds our abilities to move on. It remains that you never have any control of the past so steering away from it makes sense. The only thing you need to remember is your wife's/gf's birthday and the ATM pin number! ;P